Courage in the Face of Certain Tooth Loss

I’ve been told that I am brave and that I have courage.

I question that because I only do what I have to do. If I could choose not to do it, brother I would have in a heart beat.

Courage is not speaking rudely to someone.

Courage is not being cruel to those weaker than you.

Nor is it standing up for something when what you’re standing up for is unclear… or

simply going with the crowd against something, especially if your not informed on what that something is exactly.

Courage is that thing that you have to do for love of someone, something, or somewhere, because you love them, Courage is doing something because you have to, not because you want to and accepting that this is the only way.

It’s being uncomfortable with driving in a big city but doing it anyway, because someone needs you to pick them up from the airport. It’s watching someone’s children while they are ill and taking care of their house even though you’re terrified of being alone. It’s going out on a field and fighting for your country’s sake knowing that you might die.

It’s standing in front of someone to protect them from violence.

It’s taking a stand against someone for the betterment of someone else’s life.

Courage is saying to someone how you really feel about something in their lives and knowing that it is for their own good- even though it might damage your relationship. Even if it means that you might never see one another again, even if it means they don’t forgive you for a long, long time.

And that is courage.

Courage is not comfortable.

The reason that people who are courageous don’t see themselves as courageous is because the larger part of courage has to do with what is necessary. It’s not happy or fun, or something you want to do. It’s something you have to do. There’s not a choice in it. It’s something that must be done. And since it seems you’re the only one to do it, then you must.

That’s courage.

I’ve seen Booga be courageous in the face of something really awful.

And going to the dentist is sometimes really awful.

I think it’s the whole thing about dental work being in your head. I mean, it’s really close to your face, and you really can’t ignore it.

Booga had to have some dental work done and since I was dealing with the shock of my Uncles death- I forgot to soften the blow of telling him that he had to go in and have a wisdom tooth removed. On top of that I forgot what he was going to the dentist for? He had a cleaning a couple of months before but I forgot what else had to be done because there was talk of a possible root canal on one tooth that ended up being a filling. So I couldn’t remember what he was going to have done to his mouth. And so.... there was no preparing him. 

The nurse came out shortly after he went back with the dentist and told me that he was asking them to please not take out his tooth.

However, you know, he had to have it out- it was sideways. It was lying down inside the gum because that is Boog’s fate. If there is going to be something wrong with him it’s going to be REALLY wrong. So he had to be brave and have courage and just do it and …….He did. He lived off pudding and jello and ice cream for a couple of days.

Oh the pain of that….

That’s courage.

Courage is not screaming and running out into the lobby and lying down on the floor and kicking and thrashing and refusing to have the thing done. Boog’s not stupid. He’s autistic and he knows that tooth removable brings along with it a good deal of pain.

He’s had mouth surgery before.
He remembers it.

There are days I wonder about if I can take one more minute dealing with Boog’s problems, then there are days I ponder at the person he is, the bravery he shows and a strength of perseverance of his character, that leads him to propel himself towards adulthood.

He’s more of a man sometimes, than some of the typical men I know, and has more guts than some people could actually muster up to simply go out into the world and face the day.

So courage is being able to face the difficult near impossible and go, “Okay, I guess I can do that.”

We do it a lot without thinking about it. We just don’t give ourselves credit for it.